Better Thancake Food

BETTER THAN SEX CAKE III

Steps:

• Preheat oven to 350°F.
• Grease and lightly flour 13" x 9" cake pan.
• Mix cake as directed on package.
• Bake the cake about 35 minutes or until it tests done.
• As soon as it comes out of the oven, poke holes all over it with a fork (I actually use a small diameter chop stick) and pour sweetened condensed milk evenly over the cake, followed by caramel sauce (microwaved about one minute until warm and easily pourable - I use only about 10 oz of the jar).
• Refrigerate overnight.
• Shortly before serving, spread whipped topping over cake and sprinkle with crushed Heath bars (or bits).
• Enjoy.

BETTER THAN...CAKE

Steps:

• Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Grease and flour two 9 inch round cake pans.
• In a large bowl, combine cake mix, pudding mix, eggs, water, oil and sour cream. Beat with a mixer until smooth. Stir in chocolate chips.
• Divide into two 9 inch pans. Bake at 350 degrees F (175 degrees C) for 45 minutes.
• Frost with Cream Cheese Frosting or Sour Cream Chocolate Frosting.

BETTER THAN SEX CAKE IV

Steps:

• Prepare and bake cake mix according to box directions for a 9 x 13 inch cake pan.
• While the cake is baking, combine pineapple with juice and 3/4 cup sugar in a medium saucepan. Cook over medium heat for 20 minutes until thick and syrupy, stirring occasionally. Pierce top of hot cake with fork at 1 inch intervals. Pour pineapple mixture over cake. Cool completely.
• Beat pudding mix with milk until smooth. Spread pudding over cooled cake.
• Whip cream until slightly thickened. Add confectioner's sugar and vanilla, and whip until soft peaks form. Spread over top of cake. Chill cake for 24 hours. Sprinkle with coconut and pecans just before serving. Refrigerate leftovers.

BETTER-THAN-BOXED CHOCOLATE CAKE

Steps:

• Make the cake: Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F/180 C/gas 4. Lightly butter two 9-inch/23-cm round cake pans/tins. Line with parchment/baking paper. Butter the parchment/baking paper. Dust the inside of both pans with cocoa powder and knock against the side of the counter to settle a thin dusting of cocoa inside the pans; discard any extra cocoa. Whisk together the flour, sugar, cocoa, baking soda/bicarbonate of soda, baking powder, and salt together in the bowl of a stand mixer.
• Add 1 cup/240 ml of the warm water, the oil, and melted butter and mix on medium speed until combined. Stop the mixer to scrape down the sides of the bowl and make sure all the ingredients are fully incorporated. Add the eggs, one at a time, mixing well between additions to incorporate and aerate the batter, which gives the cake a more even crumb. Add the remaining 3/4 cup/180 ml warm water and vanilla and beat until smooth and aerated, about 2 minutes. The batter will look loose and watery, about the consistency of heavy cream or hot fudge.
• Divide evenly between the prepared pans and tap lightly on the counter to smooth the top. Bake until the cakes are evenly domed and spring back lightly when touched, about 40 minutes. Test the cakes with a toothpick inserted into the centers; if it comes out clean your cakes are done.
• Remove the cakes from the oven and let cool on a wire rack until they are just warm to the touch, about 15 minutes. The cakes will pull away from the sides of the pans slightly as they cool. Flip the pans to unmold the cakes onto a rack to cool completely, 1 hour.
• Make the frosting: Before you begin, check to make sure the butter is room temperature, just soft enough to press easily with your finger. Beat together the butter, agave, confectioners'/icing sugar, cocoa powder, and warm water with a stand mixer until light and creamy and evenly combined, about 2 minutes. Stop to scrape down the sides and make sure all the butter is fully combined. Add the cool cream and beat on medium-high until fluffy and creamy.
• When the cakes are completely cooled, slice off the dome from one of the layers with a serrated knife so that you can stack the layers easily. Lay the trimmed cake layer on a cake stand or serving platter, trimmed-side up. Tear four sheets of parchment/baking paper or wax/greaseproof paper into long strips and tuck under the edges of the cake around all the sides (this will help to keep your serving platter clean as you frost). Scoop about one-third of the frosting onto the top of the cake. Using an offset spatula or the back of a spoon, spread the frosting evenly over the top of the cake and around the sides. Cover with the second cake layer, domed-side up, and press down slightly to flatten. Look down at the cake and slide the top cake layer until it lines up perfectly with the bottom layer. Add another one-third of the frosting to the top and spread evenly over the top. Spread the remaining one-third of the icing around the sides of the cake to create a smooth, even layer.
• Make careless swirls of icing all over the top of the cake using the back of a large spoon. Serve immediately or store in a cool place until ready to serve.
• If you plan to make ahead and refrigerate, note that the icing will set up in the fridge and will sweat slightly when it comes out. Remove from the fridge about 1 hour before serving to restore the frosting to its luscious, creamy state.

BETTER THAN SEX CAKE

Steps:

• Pre-heat oven to 350.
• Make and bake cake as directed on package in a 9 x 13 pan.
• Poke top of warm cake every 1/2" with handle of wooden spoon.
• Drizzle sweetened condensed milk evenly over cake and let stand until milk has absorbed into cake.
• Drizzle with caramel or butterscotch topping.
• Run knife around sides of pan to loosen cake.
• Cover and refrigerate about 2 hours or until cake has chilled.
• Spread cool whip over top of cake.
• Sprinkle with toffee chips.
• Store cake covered, in the refrigerator.

BETTER-THAN-ALMOST-ANYTHING CAKE

Steps:

• Heat oven to 350°F (325°F for dark or nonstick pan). Make and bake cake as directed on box for 13x9-inch pan. Cool 15 minutes.
• Poke top of warm cake every 1/2 inch with handle end of wooden spoon. Drizzle condensed milk evenly over top of cake; let stand until milk has been absorbed into cake. Drizzle with caramel topping. Run knife around sides of pan to loosen cake. Cover and refrigerate about 2 hours or until chilled.
• Spread whipped topping over top of cake. Sprinkle with toffee bits. Store covered in refrigerator.

BETTER THAN SEX CAKE (CHOCOLATE)

Steps:

• Bake cake in 9x13 pan, as directed on box.
• Let it cool slightly and poke little holes in the TOP of the cake with a pencil.
• Dribble sweetened condensed milk and caramel sauce over cake.
• Let stand for over an hour until the cake has completely cooled.
• Frost with whipped topping and sprinkle crushed candy bars over the topping.
• Refrigerate until time to serve.

BETTER THAN SEX CAKE

Steps:

• Preheat oven to 350°F.
• Add each cake ingredient in the order above, blend thoroughly between each.
• Pour into a greased 9x13 inch baking pan.
• Bake at 350F for 50-55 minutes or until done.
• While cake is baking, prepare icing. Cream cheese and sugar until smooth, add vanilla, nuts, and coconut.
• Spread icing over cake once it's cooled.

BETTER THAN SEX CAKE II

Steps:

• Bake cake according to package directions for a 9x13 inch pan; cool on wire rack for 5 minutes. Make slits across the top of the cake, making sure not to go through to the bottom.
• In a saucepan over low heat, combine sweetened condensed milk and caramel topping, stirring until smooth and blended. Slowly pour the warm topping mixture over the top of the warm cake, letting it sink into the slits; then sprinkle the crushed chocolate toffee bars liberally across the entire cake while still warm. (Hint: I crush my candy bars into small chunks as opposed to crumbs - I like to have pieces I can chew on!)
• Let cake cool completely, then top with whipped topping. Decorate the top of the cake with some more chocolate toffee bar chunks and swirls of caramel topping. Refrigerate and serve right from the pan!